NaNo no more, and an interesting couple of weeks in the meantime

Since the last time I posted a lot has happened in my corner of the world. I decided that 2009 was not the year to do NaNoWriMo. This decision was arrived at in a sensible manner by me stressing out and over-thinking my novel (the opposite of what you are supposed to do, and precisely the habit I signed on to learn to shed)—then scrapping it eight days into NaNo to try another idea that’s been floating around my noggin, only to have the same problem. Add in the Day Job, a couple of home improvement projects we had scheduled for November (that are actually happening in November) and my proclamation of submitting a short story or poem a week for as long as I could keep it up, and, well, you know…

A few drops of paint from the above mentioned home improvement projects sparked a few days of in-house arguments and tension recently that was really not about a few drops of paint. Fortunately, things are better now—or are on the road to being better in some cases—and I think points, counter-points and viewpoints are better understood by all. Plus, the bathroom is shaping up nicely.

One of the more surprising developments was my return to writing for BLAM! Ventures. As I noted here previously I had decided to leave the company. For a variety of reasons my timing was horrible and my exit was not how I had hoped it would be. I had intended to finish out several projects I was working on, but I was for better or worse being shut out during the conversation with my partner and could not make this point (and that is not his fault at all). However, I felt I could not stay any longer as I would just be stringing them along and make things worse down the line.

The happy news is relationships on that front have been patched up as well. I also find myself able to finish off the one project that I had left mid-stream I was personally upset to leave, which is co-writing the first story arc for the SF comic book series The Gilded Life, to be published sometime in the not-overly-distant-future by Archaia. I should have the remaining scripts done by the end of 2009 (three scripts in a little over 40 days is not quite on par with Bill Willingham’s recent announcement of 30 scripts in 30 days, but I’ll take it).

My contributions to the other major project I was working on, the Conspiracy of the Planet of the Apes illustrated novel, will still be there, though I am not writing anything beyond what I have already. Frankly, I’m good with that. I enjoyed delving into the world more than I thought I would, but at this point in my life licensed projects are not what I am interested in writing. I’ve too many worlds crowding the real estate in my mind already, time for them to come out and be seen.

One interesting thing that came from my separation from BLAM! Ventures was the notion that I had somehow sold out in leaving. It had struck me as odd at the time though I didn’t pursue it, but further consideration has brought me to the conclusion that it’s an incorrect thought.

The way it was presented to me—at least what I got from it—was the reason I had sold out was more or less that I chose to pursue a life with my future wife and not make my career as a writer/creator my defining identity.

Here’s how Selling Out is defined on Wikipedia:

"Selling out" refers to the compromising of one's integrity, morality and principles in exchange for money, success or other personal gain. It especially refers to the attempt to increase social appeal or acceptability through this compromising.

The Urban Dictionary also has multiple definitions for Selling Out. The few I read say much the same thing as above, just cite real world examples (and those not always correct in my mind). 

 

By the above definition, I think the opposite is closer to the truth: staying with BLAM! would have been like selling out. Had I done that, it would have been purely for any payday or notoriety as a writer I might receive. Staying with BLAM! in the long run would have compromised who I am today, and wouldn’t have been very helpful to their cause, either.

This is not to say BLAM! Ventures is an unworthy endeavor. I am proud of the books I was (and for a while yet, still am) involved in. I think the company and the projects they are pursuing are pretty awesome all around and will enjoy reading/watching them when they arrive at my local comic store, bookshop, television set, theater, etc.

Of course, Catherine (the future wife I talked about earlier) is a big part of where I’m at today and headed in the future, but the shift in my direction as a person began long before that. Indeed, those prior changes are what allowed me to be ready for Catherine when she came into my life a few years ago. They’re also what finally prodded me to make the major decision to leave BLAM! Ventures in the first place. Once I would have defined myself solely as a writer, now I’m more interested in defining myself as a person—someone who is complex and at times unfathomable to himself and others (hence some of the household stress sparked by the renovations), and who is learning to live his life in a way he never did before.

As far as I am concerned, I’m not selling out. I’m anteing up.

NaNoWriMo 2009 and a change of direction

After not being able to really able to devote the time necessary since I discovered it a couple of years ago, this year I'm going to do NaNoWriMo - National Novel Writing Month! What is that you ask? I'll let them explain (click through to the site for further info):

What: Writing one 50,000-word novel from scratch in a month's time.

Who: You! We can't do this unless we have some other people trying it as well. Let's write laughably awful yet lengthy prose together.

Why: The reasons are endless! To actively participate in one of our era's most enchanting art forms! To write without having to obsess over quality. To be able to make obscure references to passages from our novels at parties. To be able to mock real novelists who dawdle on and on, taking far longer than 30 days to produce their work.

My biggest decision to make after deciding to do it was figuring out which of the several suitable backburner projects to pursue: 1) The near future genre mash up with giant monsters, luchadores, Lovecraftian creatures, alien invaders and more; or 2) a contemporary horror/thriller set in a city you can’t easily escape; or 3) a YA novel about a boy whose twelfth year takes several unexpected turns (there's some magic in it, but it will most likely be of the wonderment kind since he's not a magician). The first two are pretty massive undertakings, containing large worlds inhabited with lots of characters and I haven't had too much opportunity to really think them out yet. That's what knocked them out of contention.

The YA book, well, it's a bit smaller in scale (even though it is the first of four) and somewhat more fleshed out in my head. I've just over a week to get down further notes, ideas etc. (you can't start actually writing until November 1st), and plan to spend part of this weekend doing just that. At the end of each day you're supposed to update your word count on their site, I'll do it here as well, perhaps with occasional excerpts and updates on the action. The goal is 50,000 words in 30 days. Tough on a full time Day Job, but not impossible. I'm excited for the challenge, and the new direction in my writing.

That new direction comes at a price, however. I've posted before about my involvement with the upcoming Planet of the Apes novel, as well as my own creator owned comic series, both produced by the company I co-founded--BLAM! Ventures--and the latter to be published by Archaia. For reasons mainly personal, as of October 1st I have left BLAM! and both of those projects. It was a difficult decision, but one a long time coming and which I believe will be best for myself and for BLAM! Ventures in the long run.

My friend and BLAM! partner Drew Gaska has been stewarding these projects and more at BLAM! for a while now, and I know he will bring you nothing less than the highest quality entertainment. When they arrive I will be trumpeting them to all who will hear, and I will be eagerly awaiting to see the final product myself.

The funny thing about all of this is for the longest time I have been disheartened with my writing life and fully expected to back away for months at the very least before trying again. A week ago, though, I saw the link to NaNoWriMo and the spark I got quickly spread to flame. I feel a desire to write that I haven't in years. It may not last, I may fall back to where I was before on the brink of giving it up, but for now the words call to me again. And I believe I am back in the business of listening to them.

Nine days and counting...